It's a funny thing when you find out you have cancer. I haven't quite figured out how to react. I'm in a holding pattern right now. If I start to think about Ben and the girls I get emotional, but if I go on with my daily routine I'm level headed.
By the way, I have Non Hodgkin's T Cell Rich, B Cell Limited Lymphoma. It is mainly located in my abdomen area and its as big as of a block of cheese. The oncologist says it might be curable but no promises.
So here I am wondering what 6 months of treatments will bring me? Hopefully it can't be any worse than the last 3 months. Chemo doesn't sound fun, 6 hours in one chair. I've already been poked and prodded for weeks what's 8 treatments in 6 months?
I have not been well for at least 3 months. I haven't had enough energy to take a shower without resting for 20 minutes after. The funny thing is that if you look at the basic symptoms of Lymphoma I have everyone of them, classic text book. I thought I had some virus. It wasn't until I started loosing tons of weight that I noticed the tumor in my lower abdomen.
I am worried about Ben and the girls, so far they have been doing really well. Kira has been very helpful the last few months, even if she hates what she is doing. Maci finally understands that she can't run and jump on my stomach anymore. I don't know what I would do without Benjamin. It is true, he has been so supportive and attentive. I couldn't have asked for a better husband. My family has been very helpful too, by taking turns with the girls and cleaning my house while I was in the hospital.
That's enough of the downer news. Kira and I had a good talk today about the future, i.e, chemo, hair loss, etc. I made a promise to her that I would never stop fighting. I will use my best sucker punch and right hook. We will fight all the way.
P.S., I am grateful for all I have and thankful for all those who have helped me thus far.
